CT and Bone Scan

Friday at last and time for my scans.  I'm really tired.  I've thought and thought about this non-stop to the point of pure exhaustion.  I had both a CT scan and Bone Scan. 

Here's a description from the internet

CT Scan:  A computed tomography (CT) scan uses X-rays to make detailed pictures of structures inside of the body.  During the test, you will lie on a table that is attached to the CT scanner, which is a large doughnut-shaped machine. The CT scanner sends X-rays through the body area being studied. Each rotation of the scanner provides a picture of a thin slice of the organ or area.  

In some cases, a dye called contrast material may be used. It may be put in a vein (IV in your arm) to see those areas better. For some types of CT scans you drink the dye. The dye makes structures and organs easier to see on the CT pictures.

A CT scan can be used to study all parts of your body, such as the chest, belly, pelvis, or an arm or leg. It can take pictures of body organs, such as the liver, pancreas, intestines, kidneys, bladder, adrenal glands, lungs and heart.  It also can study blood vessels, bones, and the spinal cord.

Bone Scan: 

A bone scan involves injecting a radioactive material (radiotracer) into a vein. The substance travels through your blood to the bones and organs. As it wears off, it gives off a little bit of radiation. This radiation is detected by a camera that slowly scans your body. The camera takes pictures of how much radiotracer collects in the bones.
If a bone scan is done to see if you have a bone infection, images may be taken shortly after the radioactive material is injected and again 3 to 4 hours later, when it has collected in the bones. This is called a 3-phase bone scan.
To evaluate metastatic bone disease, images are taken only after the 3 to 4 hour delay.

A bone scan is used to:

• Diagnose a bone tumor or cancer
• Determine if a cancer that began elsewhere in your body has spread to the bones; common cancers that spread to the bones include breast, lung, prostate, thyroid, and kidney.
• Diagnose a fracture, when it cannot be seen on a regular x-ray (most commonly hip fractures, stress fractures in the feet or legs, or spine fractures)
• Diagnose a bone infection (osteomyelitis)
• Diagnose or determine the cause of bone pain, when no other cause has been identified
• Evaluate metabolic disorders, such as osteomalacia, renal osteodystrophy, primary hyperparathyroidism, osteoporosis, complex regional pain syndrome, and Paget's disease

So I had the CT scan 1st.  She gave me an IV with the contrast and the radioactive material.  The CT scan was quick.  I'm not a fan of IV's but who is right?  Once it's in, it's not that bad.  When I received the contrast my right thigh got warm.  I asked the nurse if that was normal and she said no.  It should feel like I'm peeing my pants.  Well eventually it did but I thought that was odd that my thigh warmed up like I put a heating pad on it 1st.  Weird huh?  Well, 1st test down....ready for test #2.

She told me to go ahead and leave, get some food and come back at 11:30 for the bone scan.  So Ken and I ran to McDonald's and grabbed a quick breakfast.  Afterward we went to the mall and walked around a bit.  We had time to run to Pottery Barn so that lightened my mood.  For some reason I'm really worried about the bone scan.  You'd think I'd be worried about the CT scan and all my organs but since the MRI came back with a lesion on my spine, the bone scan terrifies me.

We returned right on time and they promptly called me back. The machine wasn't scary.  The tech was really nice.  I laid down on my back and was told to lay still for 18 min.  So I did and I prayed.  Prayed, prayed and prayed.  Just laying there I just kept thinking, please don't let this be it for me.
Then she came in and told me she was going to take a scan of my ribs.  I asked her, "I don't recall doing this before"  she said, Ya, you haven't.  Humm?  I wonder why she said that.  So I asked, "is this normal?"   Well you haven't had before so we're going to do it.  Umm..Okay.  Then I got really nervous thinking did they find something in my CT scan (organs) and that's why they are scanning my ribs?  Oh geez, there's totally something there.

When I got done, I just thought, okay...it's over.  My fate is in their hands.  I wish I could just walk next door, meet with Dr. Wilkinson and just get this over.  But instead, Ken and I drove the long way home.  I was in such a daze and a state of depression.  I just can't believe this is happening.  Why?

When we got home I laid down and promptly feel asleep.  I was exhausted and honestly, I could have slept the entire rest of the day and on in to the evening but I got up around 4pm and Ken and I went out to dinner.  We went to one of our favorite places, Ford's fish shack.  Cody can't eat fish so we take advantage of going out when we can.  We had a nice dinner which lifted my spirits.  I told Ken that I really hope my results come out negative cause I really want to enjoy my spring/summer and hope to have fun with him and Cody.  And with all this stress, if I am cancer free, we need to celebrate by taking a trip to Vegas.  Cause let me tell you. I'm soooooooo tired!

So we picked up Cody and wouldn't you know on the way home I got a call on my cell from the nurse at Dr. Wilkinson's office.  I quickly thought "the nurse is calling....not the dr.  This could be good news"  Sure enough, the nurse told me my bone scan and CT scan was cancer free.  No signs of cancer anywhere.  WHAT??  Are you sure????  I can't believe it!!!  I thought for sure I had cancer again.  Well, Jennifer, you don't.  I'll mail you the results on Monday but I wanted to call you so you didn't worry all weekend long.  Thank you!

I hung up and I just couldn't believe what I heard.  How is this possible?  I'm thrilled but I swore I had cancer again.  How lucky am I?  I consider myself extremely lucky and very happy.  Still shocked but very very happy.

A much better day

I had a much better day today.  I seemed to have gotten control of my brain and all the scenarios that it was playing in my head over and over yesterday. Or maybe I'm in denial, I've convinced myself that this is a horrible dream and it's just not really real.  Who knows what's going on but no tears were shed today and that was a good thing. 


So we will see how things go as I get closer to Friday. 

What a mess

Boy oh boy was I a mess today.  I didn't sleep very well last night so I am super tired.  I got to work and as soon as I got in the office just the thought of being at work and dealing with the drama made me very upset.  My supervisor was talking to me about upcoming work projects and as he was talking I could feel myself loosing control.  Tears were filling my eyes and I asked him if we could chat in the back office instead of out in the open.

We got in the office and I started crying.  He asked what was wrong and I told him that I got a call from my doctor on my drive home last night.  She said I had a 1 cm lesion on my spine so I have to get a CT and bone scan.  I then told him that although I want to stay busy at work today my mind is everywhere but here.  He told me if I needed or wanted to go home, he totally understood.  I told him no, I'll stay.  He became very supportive and told me that work will always be here and that I have to take care of myself and the office will be as supportive as possible to accommodate me.  That was a nice thing to hear.

I called the nurse to make my appointment.  Whatever she could find that was 1st available works for me.  I just want to get these tests over with.  She called back a little while later telling me that I had an appointment for 8:30am on Friday. 

After that, I was pretty quiet for the rest of the day.  I'm just really overwhelmed and I really don't know what to think at the moment.

MRI results

Well, I don't know where my brain has been for the last 2 weeks but today at work, like 10 min before I left, I called my Oncologist's office and asked if I could talk to the nurse.  The receptionist said, that she was busy and I said okay, well, I'd like to get the results of my MRI.  So the receptionist said that the dr. was reviewing it.  Humm.....odd.  Okay well, here's my contact numbers, thanks.

As I was driving home my phone rang. I didn't think anything of it.  Until I heard my Oncologist's voice.

Me:  Hello?
Dr:  Hi Jennifer, this is Dr. Wilkinson
Me:  Hi, how are you?
Dr:  Fine, thank you.  I was reviewing your MRI results and I see here that there is a lesion on your spine.  We are recommending a CT scan and a bone scan to rule out any metastases.   Have you had any pains in your back?
Me:  No, but I had problems getting an epidural when I was pregnant with Cody.  (I have no idea why I said that.  My brain was going in panic mode and I just blurted that out.)  No, not to my knowledge.
Dr:  I'll have the nurse schedule the scans and we'll go from there.  Don't worry, this is precautionary.
Me:  Is it cancer?
Dr:  We have to do further testing to find out but I'm optimistic. 
Me:  Okay, thanks. 

I'm so confused.  I can't believe I didn't ask more questions.  I had the doctor on the line but yet I didn't know what to say.  I'm driving home and I can't write anything down so I just listened.  There's something on my spine?  I just don't know how to react to this?  I'm going to call her nurse tomorrow to set up my appointments and of course hopefully find out more information. 

But for now, I'm starting to freak out a bit.  I expected to hear something about my boobs but not my spine.  That was not on my radar.  So what does all this mean?  Man, I'm never going to get any sleep.  This is going to be a long night.

Headache!!!

Geez, I have a massive headache.  All I want to do is lay down but there's just so much more to do.  There's just not enough time in the day.  After running errands and a little girl shopping, cooking, cleaning and tending to Cody, the day *poofs* itself away.  So I was talking to Ken telling him about my headache when he chimes in:  "did you drink any water today?"  Water?  Huh? Jeez, all I had to drink was OJ this morning and a drink box for lunch.  Whoops!  Guess I didn't drink any water.  He chimed in again telling me how many glasses he drank.  Sheez!   I really don't take care of myself.  I'm so concerned about everyone else and what needs to get done that I just don't sit down and relax. 

I don't exercise....which I swore I was going to start doing.  But let's define exercise?  What about carrying laundry up and down a flight of stairs.  That's a stair stepper and weights right?  What about walking around a shopping center for a hour looking for the right winter gear to stay warm in this freezing cold weather.  That's power walking right?  Or trying on clothes....I'm lifting my arms above my head several times while  swaying my body back in forth in front of the mirror, trying to find the best angle, as well as sucking my gut in.  So wouldn't that be an ab and arm workout?

Maybe I'm not on my treadmill or maybe I'm not outside running around the block but I am inside, running around the house picking up after Cody or racing him to his room to see who can run faster.  That's some sort of exercise right?

 So the point of this post since I tend to go off in different directions is that I'm tired and have a massive headache.   I need to slow down, smell the roses and just enjoy life while taking care of myself by eating healthier and exercising.

Played Hookey - Kind of

Okay, you are probably wondering why I write so many posts about snow.  First of all, I'm a desert rat and I really don't like snow.  I prefer lounging under the sun, sitting by a pool (in my own backyard of course) sipping a margarita.   Since I don't have that luxury lifestyle I get to put all my energy in to one thing and that's focusing on the snow.  Because this is the time of year is the only time of year that I'm always hoping the snow will get me out of work.  Out of work you ask?  Yes, out of work, like not going to work at all.  And no, I'm not lazy.  I actually don't mind working, I just don't want to work far from the house anymore and I'd prefer to work part time again.  But since I can't, I'll take any free day off from work I can get and right now, snow seems to be doing a good job at it.

So today, work gave us a 2 hour delayed start.  Shocked but I'll take it.  I got up early and even Cody got up early which bummed me out cause I really wanted to sleep in till 7am.  Oh well.  I turned on the news and saw that his day care was opening 3 1/2 hours late which meant 10am.  Public school is closed so here's my dilemma.  If I drop Cody off at 10am I possibly wouldn't get to work till 11:00am with icy roads and driving slow.  Or....say screw it and just take the entire day off.  Hummm.....Do you think that was a hard decision?  Not really.

Well, I actually called Ken to get his opinion.  He told me the roads were icy.  And if he was me, I'd just stay home.  Then I called my co-worker who went in.  He said it wasn't terrible out but if I had the time off, I wouldn't bother.  2 men encouraging me to stay home.  Either they are super concerned about my safety or deep down inside, they know I just want to chill and not deal with the drama.

Anyway, I stayed home and it was awesome!!!  I kept Cody home with me and we had a great day.
I planned to do a project with him.  I have this large picture frame and was going to have Cody draw/paint a construction vehicle on it.  But wouldn't you know it, I couldn't find the paints anywhere.  I have no idea what I did with them but I know I didn't throw them out.  I hate it when that happens.  So, we just did other fun things together.  We even went out and finished shoveling the rest of the snow off the driveway.  By the way, the weatherman said Ashburn got 7 inches.  You would never know it because it's been blowing all over the place.  And it's really light snow.  Not heavy at all.

So as I was home all day with Cody I've come to the conclusion that I'm meant to be a stay at home mom.  I love my house and I love my family.  It was so cold out and it's so cozy inside.  I had so much time to do stuff which included making a really yummy pot roast in the crock pot.  I'm telling you, this one really turned out so good!

Playing hookey is fun but the weather gave me the excuse to take off.  Thanks snow day and I'm sure in a few weeks, I'll be asking for another 7 inches or more.

WOW, didn't see this one coming

I got up this morning and was just about ready to start my daily routine when I thought, let me just turn on the news for one minute and HOLY SMOKES BATMAN!!!  Everything is closed?  YES!!! There's not a flake on the ground.  Then suddenly laughter came out of me like a mad scientist as I put my hands together in delight.  My dreams have come true.

So many times the forecasters call for bad weather and so many times, nothing.  So I'm just going to sit back and see how accurate they are.  They are calling for snow to hit the DC area around 11am.  The worst part of it hitting between noon-ish to the rush hour time frame with strong winds and snow piling up.  They also said this snowfall would amount to a lot because it's a 15 to 1 ratio vs the normal 10 to 1 ratio.  And the way they explained it was in normal cases, for every 1 in of rain we would get 10 inches of snow.  So in today's case they are calling for 15 inches for every 1 inch of rain.  So at first they forecasted 2-4 inches, then 3-6 inches, now 4-8 inches.

Excitement meter:  1-10,
1 being - ehh, 10 being - AWESOME!!

TIME LINE:                                                            MY EXCITEMENT METER:                           

5am - 8:30am - Nothing                                           Nothing

8:30 - baby snow flakes                                            Humm....A few hours earlier than predicted

9:30 - big fluffy snow flakes coming down fast      8 - this could shut work down tomorrow

11:00- Sticking  to the roads, time to get Cody       5 - not liking the slippery side roads

11:30-12:15 - shoveled driveway and sidewalk      3 - not fun, but the snow is a little wet

12:15pm - News                                                       5 - they still swear this is going to be ugly

12:45 - small flakes                                                  2 - I'm so going to work tomorrow

1:00 - Flakes and wind picking u                             5 - Should I even start to get excited

1:30 - driveway and sidewalk covered                     5 - Still not really impressed with the snow

2:00 - Still snowing                                                  5 - Still only looks like 2-3 inches

3:00 - Still snowing                                                  4 - loosing my excitment

3:30 - Breaking news - still calling for 4-7 in          4 - the snow should start tapering off at 8pm

5:15 - shoveled driveway and sidewalk                   7 - wow, more snow than it actually looks like

6:00 - Windy and still snowing                                6 - the wind is blowing the snow everywhere

6:30 - School closed                                                10- Cody is jumping for joy

8:25 - still snowing but barely                                 1 - Ehh...I've lost interest

With the high winds, it's really hard to tell how much snow we really got.  In some areas it's wet and heavy and in other areas of the yard its light and fluffy.  Ken actually worked today and he said although the roads were driveable, if he didn't have to go out he wouldn't.  He said his car lost traction twice and an accident is jut not worth it.

So with this, it's hard to say if work will be closed tomorrow.  I'm leaning toward it being open.  Cody's school already called and they are closed tomorrow but I know his day care will be open, well maybe a delay.   A delay for work wouldn't be so bad either.  With the forecasters predicting a high of 16 degrees, I wouldn't mind taking my time to get to work.   But my vote is still for it to be closed.

It was way to cold today to play outside so I have no "snow" photos but while I was off, I had the chance to make lasagna for dinner tonight and chocolate chip cookies for dessert.  I did the rest of the laundry and got a few other chores done.  It certainly wasn't a R & R day.  Those days ended 6 years ago but I know I'll get those days back in a few years when Cody's a teenager.  LOL.

I do love watching the snow but I would rather be sitting by the pool soaking up the sun.  Only 5 months to go.  Happy SNOW Day everyone!!!

Homemade Chicken Corn Chowder

I really love cooking.  I just don't have the time to do it.  So I tend to cook the same things for dinner every week.  I know boring huh?  But today I had time and I pulled out an old recipe I found last year for Chicken corn chowder and I made it.  YUM-YUM!   Both Ken and I like soup but we're slightly opposites on this.   I'm more of a chowder kind of girl and Ken is a brothy soup guy.  He loves homemade chicken noodle or a beef soup.  I love it too but when it's winter I need something hearty and chowder is hearty to me.  Ken makes a really yummy clam chowder and I've made Cheddar broccoli too that's pretty tasty.  I haven't made chili yet, although that is something I would like to try.  I get a little more adventurous over the summer with cooking because I feel like I have so much more time in the evening when the sun is still shinning bright.  But for now, since it's winter, I'll stick to casserole's, crock pot cooking, and soups.

MRI Time

Ken and I both had doctor appointments this morning.  His was at 8am and mine was at 9:30am.  I dropped Cody off at school which I absolutely love doing I drove over to Ken's appointment and he was already in.  I asked if I could join him and they said no.  What??  That was a huge turnoff.  So I sat in the lobby and waited.  I figured if Ken didn't get done by 9am then I'd just head on to my appointment by myself.  Luckily he was done at 9 so we drove back to our house, jumped in one car and headed to my appointment.  As soon as we got there my nerves set in.  I updated my paperwork and my heart was beating a mile a min.  This can't be good for my blood pressure.  Speaking of blood pressure.  Ken's was high today.  How can his be high?  He got blood drawn.  I'm getting an IV while hanging out in a tube for 20 min. 

So they call me back and I have to say, I was super duper nervous but my MRI technician had a great sense of humor.  She knew I was crazy nervous and helped me through it by cracking some great jokes.  Ken was with me in the "transition" room.  I undressed and sat down while she was prepping my right arm for the IV.  I just hate needles.  Especially ones that hang out in my arm.  But it's better there than in my hand.  OUCH!  So she did a pretty quick job getting the IV set up.  She made sure both Ken and I had no metal on and took us back.  I really didn't look at the machine.  Just got in to position.  Then they covered me with a few blankets.  Ahhh....nice and toasty.  So I was lying face down, arms were above my head, face in a padded area which later turned out to be really annoying.  She put the earplugs in and slowly rolled me in to the machine.  Everything was good until she rolled me in.  All the sudden I got major vertigo.  How is that possible?  I had my eyes closed the entire time.  Uggh, the test is about to start and my head is spinning.  I got to get this under control.
Luckily I did get a grip.  I really didn't want to stop the procedure.    

So last night, I spent a good 1/2 hour listening to music that I thought would be good songs to keep in my head while I was laying in the MRI machine.  In fact I had one song in my head so well that every time I woke up last night I would sing myself asleep.  Wouldn't you know that while I was laying there in the machine that that one song didn't pop in my head one time.  In fact the beeping noises made me forget every single song I listed to last night.  All these other random beats popped in to my head.  It was like I was in techno hell.

Not only was I jamming to techno, it seemed like I was swallowing every 5-10 seconds.  Sheesh, dry mouth? What's up with that.  Then for some reason I was blinking.  How do you blink with your eyes closed?  It felt like my eyelash got inside my eye and every time I blinked my eyelash would annoy my eye. What in the world is going on?    Am I doing these things cause I can't move and my brain is making other parts of my body spasm.  

22 min over!  Thank goodness now I can focus on my annoying eye and whoa!  Vertigo.  What the heck?  The MRI tech helped me sit up.  I had to focus on the wall to get my head to stop spinning.  I must be dehydrated.  I got up, got dressed and drank some water.  I'm so exhausted.  I must have over worked myself and now I'm just worn out. 

Ken and I grabbed lunch and headed home.  I laid down for the rest of the afternoon.  I needed the rest.  I wasn't afraid of the actual test, I'm just afraid of the results.   I hope there's nothing there.  I believe there isn't but it's better to be safe than sorry.

Twas the night before my MRI....

Twas the night before my MRI  and all through the house, not Ken or Cody was stirring, not even Jen.....wait a second....that's not true.  I was completely awake, sitting in bed, thinking all about it.
I sit here and wonder how I get myself into these things.  Be careful what you wish for Jen, you just might get it.   So Last Sunday night I was feeling horrible and I woke up Monday morning felling horrible too.  Just these weird pains in my rib cage.  Left side of course.  So I called the Oncologist and got the nurse...of course.   Anyway, I told them about my annoyance in my rib area and the nurse pulled up my file.  Did you get the breast MRI done?  Ummm....thinking in my head...that would be a big no.  Well, it's not like I didn't want to do it.  With the holidays and work, I just didn't have time but now I must make the time.  So the nurse scheduled my appt for tomorrow, January 13th. 

So I'm sitting here thinking about it and it's not that I am nervous about the actual MRI itself but the results of the MRI.  It's difficult to explain.  But for me, since I was diagnosed with cancer there isn't one day that goes by that I don't think about it.  And that sucks.  There's cancer on the news, commercials about running races for cancer (which is great), so and so actor died of cancer, my scars are a constant reminder of cancer.  I get dizzy I must have cancer.  I get a stomach ache I must have cancer.  It's a constant fear and it never ends.  But I'm working on trying to get past this fear.  Stressing about it is no good.  I was thinking about seeing a counselor but haven't followed through with it yet.  My family and co-workers listen but they don't 100% understand what I'm going through so although I get the support I need, they just don't get it and that's not meant in a mean way.  When my dad was diagnosed with lung cancer, I didn't get it.  Well little did I know about a year later, I was seriously going to get it.  Both in experiencing it and learning about it.  He's a good listener and knows exactly what I feel like but he's not local.  I do call but it would be better to see him in person.  Like I did back in October.  We chatted about our experience a little but we were enjoying our time together so it wasn't a deep conversation.  And besides, I try not to talk about it, yet I write this blog?  I don't make sense do I?  Actually writing in this blog makes me feel like I'm helping someone else either understand it or maybe help someone who is going through it.  Although, everyone's experience with cancer is different which drives me nuts.  If we were all the same, maybe their would be a cure.  Maybe one day?

So anyway, tomorrow is the day I get my MRI.  I will get an IV with contrast and luckily Ken is going with me to keep me calm.  I'll have no problem in the machine.  Just hope it's not a long test.  I've gotten conflicting times.  Anywhere from 20 min - 1 hour.  I'm voting for 20 min.  And a clean bill of heath of course.

Ok now this is FREEZING COLD!!!!

5 degrees is just WAY, WAY, WAY to cold for my blood.  All the schools were delayed 2 hours this morning but do you think work was???  NOPE.  I guess in a way I didn't really expect it.  I mean why would I want to stay inside 2 hours longer so that the temperatures could rise a bit.  I don't know at least up to 15 degrees?   But nope, nada, nunca, no deal.

One year ago

Yippy Skippy!!!  One year ago today I started my new job.  The job I was just volunteering for.  Not only would this look good on my resume but it would be a change of pace.  New location, a 2 week temporary assignment, new people.  Humm......

Ya, humm my ass.  The temporary assignment turned in to a full time gig.  And although I've gotten past a lot of the personality clashes, 2 office moves with the last location being my least favorite, and still working at a job I don't enjoy...I'm hanging in there and hoping this gig won't last much longer making me realize that I'm going to have to make that change.

Still annoying

My left side rib cage is still annoying me.  Still tender and my mind is not giving me a mental break for one second.  So frustrating!

I spoke to the nurse today and we confirmed the time for Monday.  It's at 9:30am.  Kind of early.  I don't have to fast but I will get an IV with contrast.  Now I'm kind of stressing for another reason.  Just so tired of needles.  Even though I've had a break, I still have not so fond memories of the weekly stabbings but then again, those needles accompanied by meds saved my life.  So I shouldn't complain.  Just tired.

Fingers crossed this is all nothing.

Panic Mode

Ok, so my stomach was hurting all night and now I have a soreness under my ribs.  I'm frantically trying to find any kind of lump or bump and all I can feel is tenderness in the ribs.  I have this gut feeling so I waited till my Oncologist office was open and made the call.   I got a hold of my dr.'s nurse and told her how I was feeling.  She said she'd call me back.

When she called back she urged me to get the MRI that the doctor ordered back in November.  Yes, November.  With the holidays and the busyness of work it kind of slipped my mind.  So the nurse told me to get the breast MRI and when I come to the office to discuss it we can then go over my soreness in my ribs. 

Then I started to think.  Am I making this up in my head?  Am I having sympathy pains for my cousin?  Am I stressing and the stress is overemphasizing the fact that yes, sure it's sore but is it super sore or just sore?  Or did I tweak my body somehow and didn't realize I pulled a muscle?  Or is it because I slouch to the left so much at work that my weight is just bearing down to much on the left side?  Well, whatever it is....it's there and it's annoying me.  I'll monitor it but for now, my appointment for my breast MRI is next Monday. 

Strange

Today was so normal.  I had a really nice day with my family.  Ken decided to make pork and sauerkraut with mashed potatoes and green beans.  I love this dinner and I do love sauerkraut.  We sat down to dinner and finished it off.  But what was so strange was a quick belly ache with a very bloated stomach.  I felt that was so odd.  My did my stomach blow up like that?  It's not like I ate that much dinner and could there had been something else earlier in the day that I ate that just didn't jive with the port and sauerkraut?  My mind was baffled but my stomach hurt so off to bed I went at 7pm.

My mind started wondering, then I started crying.  Why was my stomach feeling like this?  Cody was in bed and around 8:30 I went in to give him a kiss goodnight since I was up in my room and didn't really spend time with him.  He saw that tears were in my eyes as I crawled in next to him to give him a hug too.  He sat up in bed, put his hands together and prayed.  Dear God, please keep my mommy healthy.  I need my mommy.  Please keep her healthy.  My tears rolled out of my eyes.  I gave Cody a hug and kiss and said thank you sweetie. 

I tossed and turned all night.  I really hope this is nothing but a big bloated stomach.