MRI and Biopsy

I had a MRI this morning and this afternoon had another biopsy.  Thank goodness today's biopsy was much easier.  Well, I don't know if I should say easier, just completely different.  Ken was with me which made the trip to the appointments much easier.  The first biopsy was in Reston, this one was in Fairfax and instead of it being a tool that made a loud noise to extract the sample, this was a needle biopsy.  Of course I didn't look at the needle so I really don't know what they did but their target was my enlarged lymph nodes.  They are worried my cancer spread so they are taking samples of my lymph nodes to check.  There were 2 doctors in the room.  One dr. took the sample while the other dr. analyzed it.  It was rather interesting and I liked the fact that I found out immediately.  So the doctor would take the sample and the 2nd doctor would leave the room to review it.  A few minutes later he came back and said that one was benign.  Oh my god, thank you.  The doc took another sample, again benign.  He took 3 samples from my left side and 2 from my right.  All benign.  I took a huge breath and let out a sign of relief.  Could this really be happening?  The cancer didn't spread?  Can I be this lucky?  Yes I am.

Appointment with the Surgeon

Today Ken and I met with my Surgeon, Dr. Purkert.  I brought my ultrasound and mammogram with me to my appointment.  Dr. Purkert carefully reviewed the films.  He told me it was important to make an appointment with the Oncologist immediately.  Apparently I need more tests run but he needs me to talk to the Oncologist to find out of I need surgery first or chemo/radiation first.  This is just so much information to take in.  In my wildest dreams I never thought I would be saying the words Surgeon or oncologist.  What is going on?  I can't believe this is happening.  Everything the surgeon said is pretty much a blur.  That's why I'm so glad Ken is here with me.  Not only is here to support me but he's here to take in all the information.  He also asked a ton of questions all of which I have forgotten.  This is just to much to fast.

It's cancer

Today started off normal.  I knew I'd get a call from the doctor sometime this week but when I did get it, I just wasn't prepared.  The phone rang around 3pm and I answered it.   Of course the conversation was longer and Dr. Sim was very compassionate but I was crying so I can only remember a little of what was said to me.

Me:  This is Jennifer
Dr. Sim:  Hi Jennifer this is Doctor Sim
Me:  Hello
Dr. Sim:  I have the results of your biopsy.  Unfortunately, it came back positive.  You have breast cancer.
Me:  (SOBBING)  Oh my god, no.
Dr. Sim:  It's ok, we're going to get you through this.  You're going to be fine.
Me:  SOBBING
Dr. Sim:  You need to call an Oncologist and a Surgeon.  I can recommend 2 for you if you would like but we need to get this done as soon as possible.  Don't worry, you will get through this.  I know this is tough to hear but we can cure this and you will be ok.
Me:  (Shaking and crying) OK

After I listened to what she said I hung up the phone.  I was sobbing uncontrollably.  I couldn't believe it.  But yet deep down inside I knew I had cancer.  How can you feel a lump like that in your breast and not know.  It was so solid, so round, I knew it wasn't normal.  I knew it was cancer and today, just now, it was confirmed.

My co-workers heard me crying and immediately came over.  They asked with concern, what was wrong and I had to say it out loud.  I have breast cancer.  Shock and disbelief came over their faces.   I got so many hugs.  I left the office and drove home.  Still crying I made a call to Ken, Mom and Wendy.  Everyone is in shock and we all need time to process this and I need to find out how serious my cancer is.  I don't want to die. 

Ultra sound #2

Finally the day has come for my 2nd ultra sound.  My appointment  was at 7:45am and I'm hoping that the needle extraction I had over a week ago has heeled and that Dr. Sim can see if my lump is truly a lump or just cysts. She did an ultra sound on both breasts, and measured the masses. Apparently I have a few cysts but one in particular was rather large.  She looked at me and told me that she needed to do a biopsy on lump that I found because it was suspicious.  I was and wasn't expecting the biopsy right then and there.  So of course I started to cry.  She assured me that everything would be ok and that she would numb the area so I wouldn't feel a thing.  The only thing I needed to be aware of was the sound of the tool she was using to do the biopsy because it was kind of loud.  She didn't show me the tool and I certainly didn't want to see it but she told me: "this is what it's going to sound like" She pulled what sounded like a trigger and a loud (CA-CHOW!) rang out.  I'm sure my eyes got large and I said to myself, whoa that was loud.  I just had to mentally prepare myself for this procedure. 

Dr. Sim numbed me and a few minutes later she said she was going to count so I would be prepared.  She counted to 3 (CA-CHOW!)  I jumped.  The noise alone makes you nervous.  1-2-3 (CA-CHOW), 1-2-3 (CA-CHOW), 1-2-3 (CA-CHOW).  It seemed like it went on forever and I wish Ken was here to be with me.  I just didn't expect this.  When the biopsy was over, I then got a small metal chip placed in my breast where the biopsy was done.  This is to let other doctors know in the future that I had a biopsy.   I was then taken to get another mammogram.  Photographic evidence of the chip.   Everything seems so weird right now.  All the samples Dr. Sim took will be sent to the lab.  I should know in a few days.  Man, I hope it's not cancer.

Mamogram

My 1st mamogram and this is certainly not how I wanted to do my 1st mamogram but it was important and need to get done.  I also had an ultrasound.  The doctor was really upset.  I was really confused.  She asked me what exactly happened yesterday.  I told her that I had a needle extraction.  She said that unfortunately, the doctor who did the needle extraction did it blindly.   Well, he felt the lump and went in with the needle.  Well, she said by doing this he obstructed the entire area so she can not tell from the ultra sound where my actual lump was.  So I have to come back in a week.  She gave me some cold compresses to put on my chest to heal it.  I had no idea this would happen.  I'm not a doctor how would I know that he would do more damage than good to me?  I'm so upset right now and I can't believe I have to wait a week and come back to get another ultra sound.

The day I found my lump

I would say my life was good.  I just bought a new house with my husband 2 weeks ago and we just celebrated the 4th of July in our new community.  Our son was amazed by the fireworks and we were having such a great time.  But today changed everything.   It was approximately 4am when I woke up this morning lying flat on my back with my left arm extended straight above my head and my right hand resting on my left breast.  How weird I thought?  I never sleep like this.  Right then, my right hand cupped my breast and that’s when I found the lump.  My eyes opened wide as I checked again.  There is certainly something there.  It’s like nothing I felt before.  Could this be a dream or am I really feeling something?  I laid there for the next hour wide awake panicking.  I know something is wrong and all I could think about about was, what am I going to do now?

9am
I didn't know what to do.  So I called my OBGYN's office.  I told them I found a lump and I needed to get it checked out.  The only doctor available was located in the Fairfax office.  I didn't care where I had to drive today.  I just knew I had to get it checked out.  Dr. Policelli was a Dr. I had never seen before.  I'd been at this practice for about 4 years and I've never even heard of him.  They explained that he is an OB in the office but doesn't participate in births so that's why I have not met him before.  Ok, I don't care who I get, just get me in.  And they did.

3pm
I met with Dr.  Policelli.  He seemed nice.  As he was doing my exam he asked how I found it.  I told him I was sleeping in bed and for some reason when I woke up I was in a position that I had never been in before.  Meaning I was on my back with my left arm straight above my head as if I was stretching and my right had was on my left breast.  It was just so weird since I never sleep on my back.  For some reason when my hand went across my breast that's when I felt the lump and I knew I had to make an appointment.  Dr. Policelli said well, I'm going to send you for a mammogram but if you want, I can do a needle extraction.  A WHAT?  He said he would take the needle, insert it where the lump was, extract fluid and if it was clear, that was a good sign.  So since I was crying and freaking out I thought, well if he pulls out fluid, that's good.  So I let him do it.  Let me tell you that was no picnic.  That was painful but there was clear fluid so I was happy and felt a little relieved.